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Teacher Jokes

New Short Teacher Jokes 2

    Q: What's the difference between your new teacher and a train?
    A: Your new teacher says, "Spit out your gum!"; but a train says, "Choo! Choo!"

    Q: Why did the new teacher give Smart Alec and A-plus?
    A: Because he made a WISE-crack!

    Kurt: I spent eight hours over my new spelling book last night.
    Teacher: It's wonderful that you spent so much time studying!
    Kurt: Who said anything about studying? My spelling book was under my bed when I went to sleep!

    Principal: So tell me, Mr Wartman. Is that little Andrew Anderson as hopeless as he was last year?
    Teacher: Well, I don't like to say he's hopeless. But he did have to cheat to get an F on a test today.

    Principal: I've been watching you to day, Mr. Wartman. It was wonderful how you managed to stay on your toes for the entire first day of school!
    Teacher: I had no choice. My students put thumbtacks on my chair!

    Teacher: How do you spell cat, Angela?
    Angela: C-A-I -
    Teacher: Stop right there. Cat doesn't have and I!
    Angela: So how does it see to catch a mouse?

    Teacher: Melody, spell mouse.
    Melody: M-O-U-S.
    Teacher: But what's at the end of it?
    Melody: A tail.

    Q: Why did the students throw eggs at the new drama teacher?
    A: Because eggs go so well with ham!

    Q: How are tough teachers like umpires?
    A: They both penalize you for errors!

    Q: What can you pay your new teacher even if you're totally broke?
    A: Attention!

    Q: What kind of teachers do you find at the South Pole?
    A: Cold Ones.

    Q: How does the new music teacher brush his teeth?
    A: With a tuba toothpaste!

    Q: How did the new music teacher get locked out of his classroom?
    A: His keys were inside the piano!


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