My husband is a man of many parts
Pity they weren't put together properly!

Q: What happened to that couple who met in a revolving door?
A: They're still going round together!

I've come to ask for your daughters hand in marriage.
Well you'll have to take the rest of her too or the deals off!

Girls whisper that they love me.
Well they'd hardly say it out loud now would they!

My brother fell in love with his wife the second time he met her.
He didn't know how rich she was the first time!

She wears her engagement ring on the wrong finger.
She probably feels she's engaged to the wrong man!

What did you get your girlfriend for Christmas?
A bottle of toilet water, it cost a fortune.
If you'd have come round our house you could have had as much water from out toilet as you wanted for free!

He has a leaning towards redheads.
Yes, but they keep pushing him away!

She was two thirds married once.
What do you mean?
Well, she turned up, the Minster turned up, but the groom didn't!