. . . . .

Jokes Directory

Tell a Joke

Receive Jokes in your email

. . . . .
Jokes.Net: Network of Comedy

Jokes.Net Professional Jokes:
Lawyer Jokes

Short Lawyer Jokes 2

    When the man in the street says: "If it ain't broke, don't fix it," the lawyer writes: "Insofar as manifestations of functional deficiencies are agreed by any and all concerned parties to be imperceivable, and are so stipulated, it is incumbent upon said heretofore mentioned parties to exercise the deferment of otherwise pertinent maintenance procedures."

    ---------------------------------------------------------------------

    In the USA, everything that is not prohibited by law is permitted.
    In Germany, everything that is not permitted by law is prohibited.
    In Russia, everything is prohibited, even if permitted by law.
    In France, everything is permitted, even if prohibited by law.
    In Switzerland, everything that is not prohibited by law is obligatory.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------------

    A junior partner in a firm was sent to a far-away state to represent a long-term client accused of robbery. After days of trial, the case was won, the client acquitted and released. Excited about his success, the attorney telegraphed the firm: "Justice prevailed."
    The senior partner replied in haste: "Appeal immediately."

    ---------------------------------------------------------------------

    A woman and her little girl were visitng the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetery back to the car, the little girl asked, "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?"

    "Of course not, dear." replied the mother, "Why would you think that?"

    "The tombstone back there said 'Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.'"

    ---------------------------------------------------------------------

    A man died and was taken to his place of eternal torment by the devil. As he passed sulfurous pits and shrieking sinners, he saw a man he recognized as a lawyer snuggling up to a beautiful woman.

    "That's unfair !" he cried. "I have to roast for all eternity, and that lawyer gets to spend it with a beautiful woman."

    "Shut up!" barked the devil, jabbing him with his pitchfork. "Who are you to question that woman's punishment?"


    Find Jokes at Jokes.Net Jokes Directory


. . . . .


Buy Comedy Books and CDs


Advertise on Jokes Net


Jokes.Net Home

. . . . .

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .


2000 - present. Australian Media Pty Ltd. All Rights Reserved.
Please read our Legal Statement and Privacy Policy.