Q: How are men like noodles?
A: They're always in hot water, they lack taste, and they need dough.

Q: How do men exercise at the beach?
A: By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.

Q: What is the best way to get a man to do sit-ups?
A: Put the remote control between his toes.

Q: What is the only time a man thinks about a candlelight dinner?
A: When the power goes off.

Q: How are men like diplomas?
A: You spend lots of time getting one, but once you have it, you don't know what to do with it.

If only women came with pull-down menus and online help.

I married Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was "Always."

- Submitted by Jokes4U.

An English professor wrote the words, "woman without her man is nothing" on the blackboard and directed the students to punctuate it correctly.

The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing."

The women wrote: "Woman! Without her, man is nothing."

- submitted by DEKern to Jokes4U.